My smile melts Papa's heart

I want to tell you that I am beautiful and that my smile melts my Papa's heart. Wow! A couple of weeks ago I would not of been able to tell you that. I would have been able to tell you I was beautiful, at least in Papa's eyes but seeing or thinking of my smile as beautiful was not in my thinking. 

As I arrived in America I was very aware of everyone's beautiful teeth and this made me more and more aware of my far from perfect protruding teeth. I had been aware of this in the UK but it became much more apparent here. Since arriving I had become even more self conscious in photos (and yes, to those of you who know me, that is possible!) never doing more than a closed mouth half smile not wanting my teeth to show. I had also started, pretty subconsciously, to cover my mouth with my hands much, much more than I ever had before. This was how I was up until last week and then Papa stepped in and as he does he turned my thinking on its head.

It all started as with one of my friends sharing a testimony in our revival group of how God had shown her she was beautiful through a class she had taken. Her testimony was really powerful. That night I was reading Captivating and as I reached the end of the chapter tears were falling as I asked Papa the question, am I beautiful? I didn't wait for an answer but went to sleep. The next morning as we were spending time together Papa said I needed to know that I was not just beautiful to him (he had shown me a few ago earlier that I am his most beautiful creation) but that I am beautiful to everyone who sees me and my smile plays a big part in my beauty. Wow! I knew this was true instantly but how did I renew my mind to believe it?

Papa had me refute the lie that my teeth stopped me being beautiful and had me declare (and add to my daily declarations) that I am beautiful. He also said that he wanted me to not cover my mouth when I talk and to smile whenever I felt conscious of my teeth. Having learnt that obedience is the best way, I said yes! After this I was face timing a friend in the UK and she asked me where my smile had gone. How awesome is God's timing! During worship at school Papa told me that my smile melts his heart. Wow! After this I saw the girl who had shared her testimony in revival group the day before and shared with her how Papa had used her testimony in me. I wanted to bless and encourage her but she prayed for me and blessed me mightily when she prayed that my smile melts Papa's heart. I love how Papa does that. I was blown away.

When I got home from school I had a photo taken of me smiling and posted it on my revival group facebook page with the words, 'this is my testimony today, I am beautiful and my smile melts Papa's heart'. I knew Papa had said I should do this and it was confirmed to be right as it was a hard thing to do and I cried as I wrote the words. As always my amazing revival group made lots of loving and encouraging comments on my post. They are truly an awesome bunch of people and I love doing life with them this year.

After this I asked my housemates and another friend to keep me accountable, especially about covering my mouth with my hand. It had become such a habit that I was not aware of doing it but knew that it needed to stop. I also knew that I had to post a smiling picture on my main profile but did not want to just post one for no reason. Thankfully, on the Saturday it was the Holiday Feast at Bethel, an opportunity to bless around 400 disadvantaged people with a great meal and lots of love, and as my housemates and I were serving we had our picture taken together. I smiled and it was posted on facebook. 

Strange as it may sound, these few things and declaring each day that I am beautiful and that my smile melts Papa's heart heart have had a dramatic effect. The proof of this is that on Sunday a friend came round and said she had to take pictures of beauty and wanted to take pictures of me, without batting an eyelid I said yes and we went outside and took them. Wow! She wanted pictures of beauty and I knew I fit the bill with my wonderful smile. So blessed! 

I love how when we tell Papa that all we are belongs to him and give him permission to bring healing and make us more like Jesus, that's exactly what he does. He is so faithful, so loving, so kind and wants to see us made whole more than we want to be made whole. 

So, is that the end of the story? Definitely not, each day I continue to declare that I am beautiful and my smile melts Papa's heart. Sometimes it is pointed out to me that my hand is covering my mouth and I have to choose to move it away. The good news is though that day by day I step more and more into the freedom that knowing I am beautiful brings and soon I will not need reminding at all.

I hope you have been encouraged wherever you are on your journey by this. Just remember, we are all made in the image of God and Jesus was the model for us all. Jesus is beautiful and therefore, being made in his image we are beautiful too. Believing anything less is saying the Creator did a bad job! I bless you to know that you too are beautiful and that your smile melts Papa's heart.